+0 的天气预报

深夜，总是让人把自己最脆弱的一面毫无保留得展现一览无遗。
任何藏在心底的不愉快，仿佛是实验室里的显微镜，几千几万倍般的被放大。好不由自主。好讨厌...
晚上，早点睡吧。请不要让自己在那种emo的情绪下，在面子书上任意放纵情绪。那样会很轻易的，把不想说的东西统统说出来。不要，请晚上早些睡。一切就会避免。
免了找歌曲听，免了找适合安静夜晚适合听得sentimentals，免了听伤心歌时毫无眼神无痛痒的哭泣。
我了解自己并不是那么安静内向的人。现在的我，似乎习惯了外在的包装，那种安静，甚至是朋友说的斯文。我不贪心，只想要一个能谈心的朋友。男女不拘。可以不要好了一半，半途中退出的朋友。甚至能半夜都能醒着，一起聊无聊的天地南北。
相处过的朋友中，大都会说我friendly，can talk to everyone including strangers...

哈。表面上我是那样没错吧。也是我遇见陌生人的生理反应，喜欢交友没错。
那，谁能解释我没有固定的朋友群？那种学期完毕回到家乡，找喝茶，看电影叙旧的朋友。
中学朋友呢，那群在班上都坐一堆的，呵。有另外一个比较懂聚会重要性的同学带领着她们聚会。
曾经我以为在班上我们聊聊天，嘻嘻哈哈的，这就是所谓的朋友帮吧。但我不懂，原来朋友都要另外在校外有个聚餐啊，逛街看戏到处兜风之类的才真正能'证实'or 巩固 友谊的地位。

后来，慢慢羡慕起一群群有固定朋友群的同学们。才恍然大悟，原来我班上的那gang是在等着somebody to initiate/organise activities.可能是我在班上都担任多职的关系，变成在朋友圈里，我不经意的扮演起领导者的角色。所以都在等我开口说搞聚会等等的东东。

但我这个傻傻的女生却是bong bong cha cha地过，都不懂这些事情。因为有家人的陪伴，所以都不患得患失。没那么重视和朋友blend more那一部分。也许那是导致她们都跟随另外一个同学的关系吧。现在都只有在面子书上联系而已了。怎么都提不出要出门叙旧...(avoidance 作祟？) 心理学说每个人都有一种程度的avoidant personality.我的巴仙率应该特别高吧？

如今，在外地升学两年了。深深体会到了，独立和群体生活是相辅相成的。
有时候好累好累，虽然知道了与朋友的outing重要，可是我不明了的是，为什么我每次那么抗拒朋友的邀约？
到头来，却自怨自艾身边没好友陪伴。真是怪人一个吧。
也许，是付出了，一次又一次的把真心抛出去，结果都沉入海中，没有回应。。。心冷了。没心了。。

越来越把自己想蚌壳般包装起来。无形中，学会保护自己，不让自己再受伤。
it's really sad...不过我真的好累。没力气试了。

我好庆幸我爱我的家人。我希望我们永远都能在一起，就像现在一样。有个家就算身处地球的哪个角落，心在任何时候都是暖暖的..

Sacrifice?

Commencement of a new semester..Hmmm....lotsa stuffs to decide on.
I really do not wish my dearie ex-roomie a.k.a. current housemate to move out from this lovely cozy unit at the end of this semester. I will be so alone! again. Gonna miss her heaps. Those silly gossips and future dreamings that we crapped on from dinner till midnight at the dining+living room. I know I can't have this fun hours with anyone else coz I experienced Robinson Crusoe's life right in this unit during the previous semester. >.<

Alright, sacrifice. The world is full of fun things that is waiting to be tried out. I know that well, but it's real tough to accept the fact that good things only come to you when you are willing to take it on the right pace.
Hey, dance cha cha? Sorry, you need to sacrifice one any how.
My choice: Flute lessons with another beginner friend of mine @ group price. cheaper pay per mth
Sacrifices: Zhongruan lesson every week/month/semester.. You gonna catch this up after you finish your semester and go back hometown to learn from your perspective teachers. Since RM80 per lesson applies to anyone( including NO-INCOME students) at any levels...why not upgrade yourself till the highest level at lower costs as possible before sending your purse to burn a hole out of it. Be smart, be thrifty, in this case. I am officially numb with anything money wise. Thank God, having to consider the moving out thingy actually put the 'kiam ji' me back in my body. I should not force myself accept something which is exceptionally and illogically expensive and unaffordable any longer. I must be insane. Staying in KL is pampering ppl to spend money like water flow> as described by chinese.

EnJoying the fullest out of 1st week of semester. No lectures today! Lecturer bo eng. I'll be having my zhongruan trial class today. TOTALLY ANTICIPATED! God bless me so I could get the most out of that good money paid. wooohooo~~~~

困惑！

原本打算好的，这学期就会带我的宝贝中阮过去kl.可是找来的两个中阮老师都开价，一小时rm80.
不要吓倒。我也是好一段时间才能接受这个价钱。直到另一位经验较丰富的导师在FB跟我chat后，才从她的看法中了解到，这实在太太贵了！
我还差点都下定决心一定要报名了。
妹妹学二胡跟有资历的老师学一个月rm50。。。。上音的笛子beginner一月rm70.
我该怎么说服自己去上这个课啊~~~~~

连姐姐，父母都不赞同我带她去。。
妈咪：还是专注学业好一些(99% 赞同。我中学时期因为太沉溺于练习，毁了课业。怎能冒险重蹈覆辙？T______T)
爹迪：太不值得了！价钱太离谱，医生都没那么好赚。(真的咯。。。==|||)
姐姐：东西太大了啦，不方便。学了也没用（这个就.....没那么大问题啦）
怎么办？上星期第二次回学校乐团练习，跟东方团长表达心里的想法。真的好对不起东方，已经有三年没能参与古晋节表演和作出贡献。他说没关系，念完书一定要回来练习。
虽说如此，我难道要Ban中阮三年或更久？> < 
等待与中阮续缘中.........

Gentle Reminder

White!

Here is a reminder for you that:

• 学生时期是学习阶段- 不要痴迷于化妆打扮，过于担心外表。。请记得你现在还未有收入。
• 当学生应穿着朴素，有礼貌。
• 不要随便答应跟同伴奢侈到贵餐馆用餐
• 请把钱省下，以便紧急备用〉〉爸爸金玉良言
• 不要吃太多，只求营养平衡
• moderate spending: hobbies---dance latin, learn zhongruan/violin, singing. 选其一，不要全部来！
• 切记妥善安排时间
• 早睡早起
• 不要放弃目标
• 不要强求好朋友，随缘份，不用急更不必愁
• 终极目标：把学业搞好，这才是付出了一定会得到的回报。〉〉爹爹肺腑之言

干爸爹！！ 咖棱~~

Say Goodbye, never to Singing!

I had been dreaming of enrolling myself in vocal lessons during last semester. But Monash workload was seriously forbiting me to think of it even for a second. And my plan is........

And I finally did that!
Right after the night we girls, me+sis and two cousies went to ktv(my first visit to karaoke fyi XD ) for a gathering,
I phoned My Music Studio to request for vocal lessons and etc.
Thanks to Bear bear who introduced me this studio which he had learnt pop songs for 4 yrs.

Yes, and last night was my eighth and the last lesson at the studio which is located at Jalan Kedandi.( vry near my house and is the reason why I decide to take up the lesson)

AWWwww......Just then, I fell in LUV in singing. It costed me RM240 (8 lessons)+ 20(registration fee). Said the studio owner, it's an intensive course for university students like me, come back once in a while for follow-up sessions.

Hey! 8 lessons from 4-20 July heh....Really, it's very intensive for my brain to 'absorb' all the info.
My vocal teacher was nice, handsome some more. I had so much fun discovering everything( actually basics only, to be exact) about singing. Maybe I'll be back for more lessons, next returning holidays? wooohooo, 3 months! anticipated totally!

People, I just wanna clarify for myself, that I am glad that I am a person who is willing to spend my money on hobbies and not that much on fashions, food and etc. To me, playing musical instruments, dancing, singing.. these are not only hobbies, but they give me an extraordinary excitement for my senses. I am terrified by any capabilities that are waiting to be discovered within me.

I have to say sowee to my lui bag. But I just can't stop myself trying out different things. I am a typical sagittarius afterall, I never say never to adventures.

In fact, when teacher Thian say what is the main purpose I come to sing. I answered, it's my curiosity which brought me here. I am kiasu, I wanna know what is so mysterious about singing that people are crazy about it. I find people who can sing very attractive and have 'qi zhi'. Weird and loso answer aside from what people usually would say-- as a hobby. But I just said it out. xD

I was kinda confident about my voice throughout the lessons, but not till I recorded my own singing using my phone. It was terrible and vegetable, like being bitten by vege worms. cacat.

yesshhh....that's it for now, I am really slack now, tired. so appreciate this first formal blog please. Do come back for more! ^^

Bloggie's Primer

Yo and a Big Hello, world!
FYI, This is a post that solely acts as a primer for my future updates. (sort of like primer for the making of DNA). Just in case you are wondering where I have been this 2 yrs+2mths, I am studying! ~.~ busy buzzy. Again, this post is a blog-composing warm up practice. Hey, stay tune!  Haze is heavy here in kooching and everywhere near Indon, take care people. 'Aquatize' yourself up!